PeaceBang

Color Me Suspicious

November 12, 2005 on 2:39 pm | In Uncategorized |

Are Men Necessary
Originally uploaded by Peacebang.

I’m pretty sure I would hate this book. In it, Maureen Dowd reportedly argues that hetero men all want to marry and date “beneath” them, ie, women who are younger, less educated, less accomplished, more easily controlled, with lower expectations of them than a woman of equal accomplishments would be.

Since my own experience in past years is that this is precisely true, I won’t be treating myself to Miz Dowd’s diatribe. I don’t like to seek out pieces of cultural fluff that pander to my anger and prejudices. That’s too easy.

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1. i would argue instead that many folks (men and women) want to marry and date status symbols. Somebody to make their friends jealous. For men, the traditional status symbol is a young(er) woman. For women, the traditional status symbol is a rich(er) man.
   that’s why I dont fully accept the idea of less educated (unless we’re talking doctors marying folks with only a master’s degree), or less knowledge. Going to a party with someone as dumb as a fencepost hurts status in the long term (although dumb but looks like they might be good in the sack, would be inded status for a short term). Indeed I personaly dont know any couples where one is that much more knowledgable than the other (my wife tells me though, that she does).
   And yes, some of us date and marry someone not for envy of our friends or to have someone to control, but because we enjoy being with them and hope to be blessed to continue to love and be loved for a long time.

   Comment by SC Universalist — November 12, 2005 #

2. Guess I screwed up. When we met (at UU church) my future wife was older, more educated, and more accomplished than me; she readily steered me in the directions she wanted me to go in order to meet her rather ambitious expectations for me. Didn’t take me long to realize she was a keeper. I apologize to Ms. Dowd who obviously understands the male psyche better than I do.

   Jeff

   Comment by Tricycle Blog — November 13, 2005 #

3. MoDo was on Larry King last night, saying that she really would like to meet a nice guy, settle down, get married, and raise a family.

   Was this book supposed to make it easier?

   Comment by fausto — November 13, 2005 #

4. Of course this is why I love UU men and hope to find one for my own li’l self.

   Honest to god. If MoDo is, like me, taking her sampling off of Match.com, she’s got plenty of fodder for her spurious thesis. If she’s actually hanging out in interesting circles, she’ll have to admit she’s a bitter blowhard. For every Woody and Soon-Yi, there’s a Mike Nichols and Diane Sawyer.

   I’m not getting that book. You can’t make me get that book. I may sit at Barnes and Noble and READ that book, but you cannot get me to buy that book.

   Comment by PeaceBang — November 13, 2005 #

5. I think books like this are useless because they are utterly predictable.

   This is an example of cultural studies (my major) at its worst because there’s no wisdom or direction in it; just a presentation of random popular culture incidents.

   Comment by LaReinaCobre — November 13, 2005 #

6. Two words, PB: Keith Olberman. Get John Buehrens or Forrest Church to make the introduction if you have to, but do it.

   You’ve got to nab him before MoDo does.

   Comment by fausto — November 14, 2005 #

7. “my future wife was older, more educated, and more accomplished than me”

   Me too. I couldn’t be happier.

   Comment by Jason — November 14, 2005 #

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