PeaceBang

Albuterol

Albuterol
Originally uploaded by Peacebang.

So I sez to the doc, “Doc, ya gotta help me. All I do is cough. I cough so hard my eyeballs pop out. I cough all night long. My coughing keeps all the dogs in the neighborhood up. I’m shaking loose my guts, doc. I get no rest. I’m like an old lady now. I can’t put on my eyeliner straight, I’m coughing so much.”

So the doc says, “You got bronchitis. You got to breathe this asthma medicine and it will give you a kick, like you just drank sixteen cups of coffee, but you won’t be coughing. At least I think you won’t.”

So I go to the pharmacist, the cute red haired guy at the Stop & Shop, and he says, “Hey, I like your haircut,” and he gives me this magical little canister of Albuterol and I shoot myself in the mouth with it and bam, the coughing stops — mostly — and I take a five hour nap and now I feel like a new woman.

Thanks gods.