Comments on: “Out Of Control”: A Sermon Excerpt http://www.peacebang.com/2008/02/22/out-of-control-a-sermon-excerpt/ The manic mind of the minister -- Auntie Mame Meets Cotton Mather Fri, 05 Sep 2008 08:59:07 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.5 By: Will http://www.peacebang.com/2008/02/22/out-of-control-a-sermon-excerpt/#comment-14094 Will Thu, 28 Feb 2008 13:05:11 +0000 http://www.peacebang.com/2008/02/22/out-of-control-a-sermon-excerpt/#comment-14094 It's always a pleasure to read your sermons, PB. It’s always a pleasure to read your sermons, PB.

]]> By: Mary Clara http://www.peacebang.com/2008/02/22/out-of-control-a-sermon-excerpt/#comment-13848 Mary Clara Fri, 22 Feb 2008 19:37:57 +0000 http://www.peacebang.com/2008/02/22/out-of-control-a-sermon-excerpt/#comment-13848 PB, this is a wonderful message about soul, control, and how life REALLY is. I particularly want to affirm your view that when catastrophe strikes, "we reach out with food, money, words of comfort or offers of help not to provide security but to incarnate solidarity, not to stand defiant in the face of what we cannot control and pretend that with our good intentions or generous gifts we can make everything right, but to say, this too, is life, and even in this time of terrible uncertainty or suffering, life goes on, and we are in favor of it. We are out of control, and yet we say yes to life, and give our hearts to it again and again, day after uncertain day." Solidarity and affirmation. Amen, Sister. PB, this is a wonderful message about soul, control, and how life REALLY is. I particularly want to affirm your view that when catastrophe strikes, “we reach out with food, money, words of comfort or offers of help not to provide security but to incarnate solidarity, not to stand defiant in the face of what we cannot control and pretend that with our good intentions or generous gifts we can make everything right, but to say, this too, is life, and even in this time of terrible uncertainty or suffering, life goes on, and we are in favor of it. We are out of control, and yet we say yes to life, and give our hearts to it again and again, day after uncertain day.”

Solidarity and affirmation. Amen, Sister.

]]> By: anonymous today http://www.peacebang.com/2008/02/22/out-of-control-a-sermon-excerpt/#comment-13846 anonymous today Fri, 22 Feb 2008 17:23:05 +0000 http://www.peacebang.com/2008/02/22/out-of-control-a-sermon-excerpt/#comment-13846 Thanks for this sermon, which I'm going to need to come back and read again. and again. I'm in situations--always, where I can't control things, so I find that I tend to over control what I can control. For example, I'm going to chaperone a youth trip to Eastern Europe, and I confess, I'm nervous about it. I haven't been overseas in 20 years. I'm excited, but nervous. So what am I doing? Obsessing on the part I can control--what to pack. It makes little sense, except that it brings me some comfort. In another situation, my daughter is being diagnosed with learning disabilities. And I confess, letting it all go, and letting her know she is supported in the universe isn't enough. i don't need to rail against the universe, but I need to read, and learn and figure out how to advocate. That's my job. The point of balance is figuring out what is mine to do, and what I need to let go of. It's hard to stop the brain from working overtime. Thanks for this sermon, which I’m going to need to come back and read again. and again.
I’m in situations–always, where I can’t control things, so I find that I tend to over control what I can control. For example, I’m going to chaperone a youth trip to Eastern Europe, and I confess, I’m nervous about it. I haven’t been overseas in 20 years. I’m excited, but nervous. So what am I doing? Obsessing on the part I can control–what to pack. It makes little sense, except that it brings me some comfort.

In another situation, my daughter is being diagnosed with learning disabilities. And I confess, letting it all go, and letting her know she is supported in the universe isn’t enough. i don’t need to rail against the universe, but I need to read, and learn and figure out how to advocate. That’s my job. The point of balance is figuring out what is mine to do, and what I need to let go of. It’s hard to stop the brain from working overtime.

]]> By: Jim http://www.peacebang.com/2008/02/22/out-of-control-a-sermon-excerpt/#comment-13843 Jim Fri, 22 Feb 2008 16:58:12 +0000 http://www.peacebang.com/2008/02/22/out-of-control-a-sermon-excerpt/#comment-13843 Beautiful, profound, soul-stirring stuff. Thanks for sharing it! I'm honestly not sure how I'd answer the question about what I'd want my loved ones to do while I'm lying unconscious in a hospital bed. I've seen situations where the doctors really need to be yelled at (or at least have their attention re-directed). But I get your point, and it certainly transcends any of my nitpicking objections. Thanks again. Beautiful, profound, soul-stirring stuff. Thanks for sharing it!

I’m honestly not sure how I’d answer the question about what I’d want my loved ones to do while I’m lying unconscious in a hospital bed. I’ve seen situations where the doctors really need to be yelled at (or at least have their attention re-directed). But I get your point, and it certainly transcends any of my nitpicking objections.

Thanks again.

]]> By: Mars Girl http://www.peacebang.com/2008/02/22/out-of-control-a-sermon-excerpt/#comment-13842 Mars Girl Fri, 22 Feb 2008 16:53:32 +0000 http://www.peacebang.com/2008/02/22/out-of-control-a-sermon-excerpt/#comment-13842 <i>Quoth PeaceBang: I think that many of us were raised to confuse love with control, that is, “I want these things for you and I want your life to go in this way, and that means that I love you.” </i> I think this is the quintessential point that caused problems with my mother and myself for years... Learning you have no control over a situation is one of the hardest things to accept in life. When I was younger and much more naive, I was sure that I could control the course of my life--that I could defeat an early death--merely by force of my will alone. I wanted to live, I would not die until I was old. When my husband died suddenly at the age of 32, I was angry at him for months because I felt that he didnt try hard enough to live. He was young, so he should have been able to will himself to hold on until the paramedics could arrive and revive his heart. I was really stupid. Loosing him taught me that I have no control over life and death, something I should have known all my life. But I was only 26--the age of invincibility. Since then, my days are often filled with trying to recognize what I can and cant control, and then trying to accept the answers. I have found comfort in the Serenity Prayer, which is probably the wisest words ever written for overcoming difficult situations. This prayer does not ask God to fix your problems, but asks this power to help you find the wisdom to recognize the things you can and cant control. At the end of the prayer, the power is in your hands to do with that wisdom what you need to do to live. I know it's almost a cliche, but that prayer has really given me a lot of strength in overcoming my own plights of grief... Peacebang, if I'm ever in your area of New England, I would love to attend one of your services (I am a fellow UU). Quoth PeaceBang: I think that many of us were raised to confuse love with control, that is, “I want these things for you and I want your life to go in this way, and that means that I love you.”

I think this is the quintessential point that caused problems with my mother and myself for years…

Learning you have no control over a situation is one of the hardest things to accept in life. When I was younger and much more naive, I was sure that I could control the course of my life–that I could defeat an early death–merely by force of my will alone. I wanted to live, I would not die until I was old.

When my husband died suddenly at the age of 32, I was angry at him for months because I felt that he didnt try hard enough to live. He was young, so he should have been able to will himself to hold on until the paramedics could arrive and revive his heart. I was really stupid.

Loosing him taught me that I have no control over life and death, something I should have known all my life. But I was only 26–the age of invincibility.

Since then, my days are often filled with trying to recognize what I can and cant control, and then trying to accept the answers. I have found comfort in the Serenity Prayer, which is probably the wisest words ever written for overcoming difficult situations. This prayer does not ask God to fix your problems, but asks this power to help you find the wisdom to recognize the things you can and cant control. At the end of the prayer, the power is in your hands to do with that wisdom what you need to do to live. I know it’s almost a cliche, but that prayer has really given me a lot of strength in overcoming my own plights of grief…

Peacebang, if I’m ever in your area of New England, I would love to attend one of your services (I am a fellow UU).

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